Turned Around 3
by Erin Cade
Summary: Soda wants to become a woman? Dally's collecting stamps? And what the hell are Pony and Johnny doing?


**Turned Around 3**

Darrel Curtis walked into house, hoping for some quiet.

He was relieved when he came into total peace.

"Long day at work." He said to himself as he flopped onto the sofa, and tilted his head back until it leant on the soft cushion.

Just as Darry was drifting off to sleep, he heard someone walk in the door. Or some ones.

Darry lifted his head, and saw Pony and Johnny.

"Hey guys." He said, and he got two nods in return.

Darry wonder briefly why they didn't say anything in return, but in the end he was just too tired to care.

"Dar, do we still have that big kite?" Pony asked his older brother.

Darry looked up again. "No, Soda wrecked it a couple of years back. Why? It isn't windy, anyways."

Pony shrugged. "Just asking."

"Whatever." Darry shrugged it off, and lay his head back down. He'd had a l-o-n-g day at work.

Pony and Johnny left, and instead Two-Bit came in, humming.

At least _he_ was acting normal!

"Hey Darry." Two-Bit greeted, plopping onto the sofa next to Darry.

"Hi." Darry grunted.

"What're Johnny and Pony doing?" He must've noticed Johnny and Pony.

"Not sure. Don't really care." Darry mumbled.

Suddenly, they heard a kind of crashing sound coming from.. the bathroom?

Darry and Two-Bit ran to the room of smelly bowel movements.

"Ponyboy Michael Curtis, what the hell are you doing?" Darry asked automatically, before he looked inside.

Johnny and Pony were caught in.. the shower curtain.. and the poll the curtain was connected to.

Pony looked kinda guilty.

"N.. nothing.."

"Bullshit, Pony." Darry glared at the mess.

"It's.. it's.. RUN JOHNNY!" Screeched the youngest Curtis, and the two friends ran out with the shower curtain before Darry could say 'tweezers'.

"What was that about?" Two-Bit asked out loud as Darry studied the scene in the bathroom.

"Who cares? I just want my shower curtain back. Those two little twerps better get back here to clean this mess." Darry simply walked out of the bathroom. He'd deal with this in the morning.

Soda and Steve came barreling in just then.

"Darry! Soda has some news!" Steve yelped, and Darry rolled his eyes and slumped onto the sofa.

He didn't really want to know what Soda and Steve were on about at the moment.

"Alright. What is it?" A very tired Darry asked his younger brother.

"Darry, I want to.. become a woman!" Soda grinned, and Darry's jaw just dropped to the ground. Literally.

"Umm.. right then.." Darry didn't know what to say.

"I find myself always trying on Mom's old clothes and liking what I see. I just feel so.. sensual!" Soda kept grinning, but Darry just stared at his little brother with disbelief and exhaustion.

"Umm.. can we talk about this in the morning?" Darry asked, and Soda just agreed and started giggling and talking to Steve.

Luckily they left the house.

So Soda wanted to be a woman, and Darry wanted to sleep. Excellent.

As if Darry wasn't both tired and disturbed enough, Dally came in just then.

He was wearing glasses and dressed neatly!

Darry just groaned and closed his eyes. Not again.

"Hello there Darrel. Keith." Dally addressed them.

"_Dally_?" Two-Bit gasped.

Dally laughed. "Oh, Keith, silly, silly, Keith. It is not appropriate to call people something that isn't their birth name. My name is Dallas, not Dally."

Two-Bit just stared at Dally.. err.. 'Dallas' and snickered. "Are you sure you ain't high or something?" He asked, feeling Dallas' forehead.

"I'm perfectly well, Keith. I should be asking you the same question. Your clothes are appalling, you need to tuck your shirt in and stand up straight! Stop slouching, and keep your chin up."

Two-Bit just stared.

"Keith, it is rude to stare. I know I am unbelievingly handsome, but you should be focusing on your looks, not mine." Dallas chuckled.

Two-Bit was dumbfounded, just like Darry.

"Darrel, it is good to see you. Good day at work?"

"Swell." Darry mumbled. He could feel a headache coming on from Dally's new, stupid, high and annoying voice.

Two-Bit started laughing.

"Hahaha. Dal, your balls haven't dropped!"

Darry looked at Dallas, deeply scarred.

"They have too, Keith!" His voice squeaked, kinda rebutting his own statement.

"SAGGY BALLS! SAGGY BALLS!" Two-Bit chanted, and Dallas burst into tears.

"They have too, Keith Mathews! And you are a big meanie! Now I shall go and work on my stamp collection!" Dallas ran out of the room, leaving a disturbed Darry and a laughing Two-Bit.

"What a nerd! His balls haven't even dropped, and he has a _stamp_ collection! Who the fuck collects stamps?"

Darry had had enough. So he was deeply annoyed when Soda came running back into the room.

"Darry, Darry, come quick!" Soda yelped.

"What is it _now_?" Darry moaned.

"It's Pony and Johnny!" Soda yelled dramatically, and soon the three reached a lampost. With Johnny and Pony balancing on top of it.

Pony was holding one end of the floral pattern shower curtain, while Johnny clutched the other end.

"Ponyboy Curtis! Johnny Cade! You two better come down here now or I'll come up there and beat the tar out of you!" Darry threatened, but the two just shook their heads.

"We're gonna FLY!!" Johnny yelled the reply.

"Get the fuck down here or you'll both hurt yourselves!" Darry screamed up at them.

Pony nodded to Johnny, and they squatted.

"Oh no.." Steve mumbled, and Darry realised what they were going to do.

"JUMP!" Pony yelled, and they both jumped.

Darry covered his eyes. He couldn't look.

When he didn't hear the sound of the two falling and breaking their backs on the pavement, Darry opened his eyes.

He couldn't believe it!

Johnny and Pony were gliding high in the sky, by the stupid shower curtain!

The two of them waved, before they flew off into the distance.

Darry and the others went back, and he collapsed onto the sofa. He was pooped!

So, from that day, Darry was emotionally scarred for life, and you could even call him 'disturbed'. He even went to see his old friends at the psychiatric ward occasionally.


End file.
